First Winter Snow and Topless Bathing

The first snow of the Gothenburg winter fell this morning. It started about half an hour before I was due to leave, fell softly when I started to walk to work and gradually got heavier. I left my hood down and just let the flakes fall on me. Call me weird if you must, but I really enjoyed it!

One of my work colleagues is Australian, only moved to Sweden about 6 months ago or so, and she's only ever seen snow once, which was already settled. So you can imagine her excitement as she came into the office this morning, jumping around and saying "I had to phone my mum and tell her". Bless her, I wish I could experience that again!

There was also this article in The Local this morning, about women wanting the right to bathe topless. Well, I'm not going to stop them. Unless they're elderly ladies' floppy breasts (as Marcel Donné once put it).

Anybody "wanna" learn english?

Good lord.

I was reading The Local (Sweden's news in English), and I decided to click on the Notice board, where people can leave all kinds of messages. As you can probably guess, they usually fall into two categories: "Need a place to live" and "need a job". I myself am guilty of the second category, after posting a message on there about six months ago.

But sometimes there is something different on there, as this post shows. I've copied it below as well (just in case the previous link expires). Suffice it to say that it's an absolute classic. Yes folks, if you "wanna" learn english (with a small E) contact this obviously reputable fellow.

WANT TO LEARN ENGLISH?

Ad type:	Announcement
Location:	Gothenburg/Västra Götaland
Date added:	2nd November 2007

if you wanna learn english language please contact me: trickyire@yahoo.com we'll make arrangements

Contact details for this advertiser are in the description

Multiplicity

Multiplicity
Originally uploaded by dollen

Great little photo. Sexy back, and the bird-flip is a bonus :)

Continuing Swedish

Yesterday was my last lesson in the "Swedish for Beginners" course that I enrolled in at Folkuniversitetet. Nanda, the teacher, was excellent. We used the course book sometimes, but a lot of the stuff was done by talking, writing in groups and copying things down from the wipeboard. She preferred to teach us at the pace that we were comfortable with, rather than stick to the book's set course; and for that reason we actually learnt more than we could have.

So impressed was I that, when she said we could go straight into "Nivå två" (level 2), I signed up straight away. This means that we actually carry on and the first lesson is next Tuesday - same times, same days. Nanda mentioned that most students take two or three courses before they feel confortable enough to go out with their knowledge and carry on learning on their own, and judging by how I'm going, I agree with that. I'm still not quite comfortable enough talking in public, but I do try to talk to Linda in Swedish sometimes and, with a few errors, I'm able to make myself understood. I'm sure another 12 lessons will see my confidence grow even more, and I'll be able to talk to "Svensson" (that's Swedish for "Bloggs") without feeling doubtful of my language.

Here comes Baker Boz

I've always been interested in cooking my own food, but when you live on your own, you rarely get the enthusiasm to spend time on making any food - cooking for one seems like too much effort.

Recently, however -- thanks to changes in my life -- there is plenty of opportunity to cook now. I could cook-up a big batch of food, eat on the evening of preparation and take the remainder in as a work-lunch for the next one or two days.

Or, in the case of this weekend, we can make it a "couples activity". I had mentioned to Linda that it's my turn to provide the food for the Thursday Fika, a "tradition" held in the support room at my work. (Although I'm not in support any more, they have made me a lifetime honorary member.) So, Linda decided it's time for me to bake something -- or, more to the point, somethings.

The "somethings" in this case were kanelbullar (cinnamon buns), a very popular food to take with one's fika in Sweden. Basically it's a risen pastry (super-puffed with yeast) with oodles of cinnamon (and sugar, obv); glazed with egg and topped with pearl sugar. If you got one from a konditori (patisserie), they're really yummy. I wasn't quite so confident that mine would stand the test, but I was willing to give it a go.

Suffice to say that I surprised myself! We managed to make a batch of 40 of them... of which 34 are left (Linda and I had to have three each and felt bloated afterwards!). So proud was I that Linda egged me on to make a quick batch of raspberry jam-filled cookies too.

So, I think the support guys will be impressed - if not a little surprised - with my contribution to the Thursday Fika.

I would have shown you a photo of the finished product, but alas I forgot to transfer the picture from my camera. I shall edit this entry when I've done that.

UPDATE: Here's the pic!

I'm how old now?

Another birthday has come and gone... it wasn't an "important" number -- nothing special to celebrate especially -- but it was good. My birthday landed on a Saturday, so in the evening -- quelle surprise -- we went to Kville Biljard; "we" being Linda, Kenneth, Robert, Jocke and Hayley; Jeff (a work colleague and one of the guys I'm going to Swedish lessons with) turned up later too. Small but good fun, doing what I like to do!

Linda bought me "Bioshock" for my XBox 360... Oh. My. God. What a fantastic game. I've gotten bored with FPSs, but this is SO much more. Lots of thinking as well as blasting, and the DNA "upgrades" you can inject into yourself are great (my fave being Telekenesis!). On top of that, the graphics are beautiful - retro (from the 40s and 50s). Yum. Go buy it now!

Beautiful landscape!

Here's a great photo 4U2C (as the SMS generation would say). Beautiful female form, great lighting, and full-length (or in this case, width!). Enjoy....

(Remember if you're at work... get back on with it soon!)

She Undresses for a Great Wall
Originally uploaded by ★Tomàquet Pink★

Technical Magazine... wtf?!

There's a gadget shop with a catalog that you can get in Sweden called Teknikmagasinet. It's along the lines of something you would get from, say, Radio Shack or Maplin.

We had a copy delivered here at work, and I decided to thumb through it.

"[flick flick] Ooh, gadgets! [flick] Yummy, more gadgets! [flick] ooh, want one of those! [flick] Vibrators! [flick] ooh, more... WTF?! ... [flick back] vibrators??"

Yep, thanks to Sweden's sexual liberation way back in the 60s and 70s, there's still proof that they're still pretty much laid back with all of "that stuff". Vibes, dildos, electronic Fake Orgasm sound keyrings, candy underwear and a bunch of other adult-orientated toys and games (they call that "vuxenleksaker"; literally "adult playthings"). Next time I buy something from there, it'll be a remote controlled helicopter, a USB cable, and that nice Anal Intruder on page 154.

Standing up

Standing up
Originally uploaded by Allure + Desire

Have a dekko at this lovely picture by "Allure + Desire" on Flickr. Yumsome! He's one of my favorite photographers for the "arty farty" shots in Flickrland. Normally I'm more of an arse person (as most of my friends know), so expect a few postings on here when I see some good ones of those - but I just love the lighting on this photo!

Mastering Swedish Mini Series

Every now and then, I come across a Swedish phrase that makes me giggle, especially when I've learnt a new word which makes that phrase understandable.

If I come across a phrase or word, I'm going to go ahead and print it here as a Blog entry (I'll tag it for easier reference).

So here's the first one. It comes from an interview that the Swedish Metro daily newspaper had with Per Morberg, a classically-trained Swedish actor that now has his own cookery show, with a unique style:

"Samma jävla skit varenda gång."

[It's the] same fucking shit every time.

Perfect!

International Talk Like a Pirate Day, YAARRRR!

Ahoy me hearties!

Yesterday was the aforementioned ITLaPD, which happened to fall on a Wednesday, when I broadcast a show for SLAY Radio. However, originally I was going to miss it because I had decided to skip at least one week, while finding out how much homework I was going to get from the Swedish lessons. When we didn't get any, I decided to broadcast a show anyway, and -- of course -- I had to mention Pirate Day pretty much all the way through the show.

If you missed it, you can listen again by downloading the MP3 from here.

Jag läsa svenska

So, I had my first Swedish lesson this evening, at 17:30 just after work. I am learning it with two of my colleagues, Amanda (an Australian) and Jeff (a Canadian). There are 20 of us in the class, most of them students at Chalmers from all over the world (USA, Japan, Germany, Latvia, Russia), but also a guy working for Volvo and a couple other international companies.

The first lesson went really well, and I'm champing at the bit for the next lesson. Of course, somewhere in the middle of the course I'm probably going to be cursing it and getting frustrated that I'm getting things wrong, but starting the lesson off with enthusiasm is always good.

Jag heter Alistair. Jag är inte gift, men jag har en flickvän. Jag jobber i göteborg på Lavasoft. Jag kommer från England och jag pratar englesk och lite svenska.

That's kind of the stuff we learnt in the first lesson, plus spelling our names. For those who are curious: My name is Alistair. I'm not married, but I have a girlfriend. I work in Gothenburg for Lavasoft. I come from England and I speak English and a little Swedish.

Simple huh? Well, for the first lesson, I guess so...

Radio 1: Established 1967

I think just about everyone has heard of the BBC (British Broadcasting Corporation, or "Beeb" for short). As well as high quality programs, they're well-renowned for their superior news sector.

One radio station that I still listen to in Sweden is BBC Radio 1, mainly aimed towards a young audience with chart music and new breaking tunes. I know I'm no spring chicken, but I was brought up listening to this station and I remember the likes of Simon "Batty" Bates (with Our Tune and the Golden Hour - "But what was the year?"), DLT (Dave Lee Travis), Steve Wright, Simon Mayo, Mark and Lard ("STOP!"... "Carry on!") and, the current self-proclaimed "saviour of Radio 1", Chris Moyles, whose show is the only one I listen to nowadays.

The station is coming up to its 40th birthday, and to celebrate, they are running a compaign called "Radio 1: Established 1967" (a bit long winded, but apparently it's not as crusty as saying "We're 40 years old, y'know!"). Celebrities and past DJs will be coming on board to do special shows - for instance, the first DJ to be heard was Tony Blackburn on the breakfast show and he will be co-hosting with the current Breakfast Show host, Chris Moyles. It's going to be great to reminisce for a while and, if you live in the UK and listened to Radio 1 at any point - or even if you didn't - I think it's going to be well worth "tuning in".

For more information, go to http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/established1967/

Oh, and thankfully Radio 1 have "Listen Again" on t'Internet, which is how I can listen to it here in Sweden. Nice!

Update: I just have to tell you that Chris Moyles has resurrected The Golden Hour (Butch And Sincere, "But What Was The Year?"), where they play two half-hour slots, each half-hour filled with songs from one particular year; and you can (just for fun) text in what you think it is and play along. It was one of the most popular slots of Radio 1 in the breakfast show when it was hosted by Simon Bates (and I think Simon Mayo carried it on, IIRC). It's on between 9am and 10am (UK time). It's mint!

The Sweetest Thing... boggles the mind

I'm back at work today, after a relatively quiet weekend. I actually took the opportunity to start tidying up the flat. I'm a bit of a hoarder, so I have a lot of crap hanging around. When I move next time (which will happen sometime in the future), I don't want to have to lug around quite so many moving boxes.

We actually went out for a walk on Saturday afternoon, as we were both getting a bit stir crazy; we took a tram into town and went to Järntorget (literally "Iron Square"), an older part of town, and onto Linnégatan. Then we just went home and watched a video.

On Sunday, we hung around and then drove back to Linda's for a walk and a relax. We hired a couple of DVDs out: Finding Nemo (which Linda still hadn't seen) and The Sweetest Thing, a chick-flick with Cameron Diaz. Oh my God. It's one of the most bizarre films I've ever seen. A third of the way through the song, they break out into a Fame-style song and dance, singing "Your dick is too big" to the tune of I'm Too Sexy. Then there's a "Movie Montage" where they dress up as film stars. Then they sing the tune to Armageddon while one of the girls is stuck in fellatio with her boyfriend (because her tonsils are stuck to his piercing). It's... just... wrong.

Anyway, after an uneventful train trip back to Gothenburg, I'm back at work, getting myself up to speed with everything. I'm left with an 80-cigarette-a-day cough though...

It's that time of the year again...

Yes, the transition between Summer and Autumn (or Fall) is when most people get a cold. Linda and I are no exception. Linda excused herself from work halfway through Tuesday. I suddenly started having that feeling - when you know you're going to get a cold - halfway through Wednesday, but I struggled on. I did a show as usual but I was really battling. Thursday morning, it had taken full hold of me.

Linda was still off work, so she managed to find a scrap of energy and drive down to mine, with Åke, so that we could be in pain and misery together.

It's Saturday morning now, and I've developed a cough from yesterday. I decided to get up at 8am, just so that Linda could have a few hours' decent sleep without me sounding like a 60-cigarettes-a-day smoker in her lughole.

I'm feeling a bit better today, which is good; today and Sunday should see me ready to get back to work on Monday, and of course, ready for the first Swedish lesson on Tuesday!

Sign o' the Times

BBC News have just posted an item about a programme they're going to be showing on television, about citizens' opinions on whether the UK is in a "moral decline". Unfortunately, the summary shows that most people think so.

This is, of course, one of the reasons I left the UK in the first place. I was finding it more and more difficult to be happy in a place where nobody really seems to care about their neighbours any more, the government keep promising to do something about it, but they seem to be clueless themselves, setting up "citizen's juries" to find out what the "common person" would do - more ammunition to those who say that Labour are out of touch with the nation. Social integration is also deterioating between native Brits and immigrants, and it's my opinion that this is in no small part because of so much negative press in the daily "Red Tops" (The Sun, The Mirror et al). Of course, the press is always supposed to be neutral, but I've noticed they're very clever in walking the tightrope between comment and opinion, giving White Van Man (the average Red Top reader) subliminal anti-comments without being blatant.

I'm not saying Sweden is Utopia, of course. There's social integration problems here too (as an example, this item on The Local, Sweden's news in English). But the nation, in general, are a tolerant people in my experience, and friendly (once you get them over their initial shy silence). The taxes, although high, guarantee a first-class "cradle to grave" system where the government looks after you at certain critical points in life (their parental leave policy, for instance, is generous) and as an offset, renting / mortgages are cheaper, so not as much is drained out of your monthly wage.

I would be interested to see the BBC programme in full, but I doubt I can. If anyone sees it, let me know your opinions on it.

What Was That About "No Rushing?"

It seems very unusual for me to post two blogs in relatively quick succession, but I find it necessary in this circumstance.

I distinctly remember typing along the lines of "me and the lady are dating; no rushing". So, forgive me if I'm a little light-headed right now.

Linda ("the lady" in question) was in göteborg this past weekend, ostensibly to meet up with an old pal of hers whom she hadn't seen for a donkey's age. We talked about "maybe meeting up if there was enough time" but I had assumed that, because of the length of time between them seeing each other before, there wouldn't be much of a chance. That's fine, I would be seeing her this coming weekend anyway.

"Imagine my surprise," as they say in the Letters column of your dreary local newspaper, when I got a phonecall asking if I was free of a Saturday evening, and would I like to come over to a restaurant and hang out with Linda, her long-time friend and some assorted other people who didn't have other Saturday plans already in place. "Sure," I said. My Saturdays of late have been a regular sequence of listening to SLAY Radio, then going to Kville Biljard and playing pool with whoever was available. Enjoyable as it is, sometimes one would like one's Saturday evenings to be a little bit "different".

The evening began as any restaurant-based evening is wont to do: smalltalk, a few drinks, a meal after some time had passed. Replete from our plates of (admittedly very tasty) food, we carried on talking. However, at some point, Linda and I both noticed that we were really only talking to each other; the other guests were sitting next to us but had been blurred out by our minds. Then, "the moment" happened. We stopped talking and just looked at each other for a few minutes. "Why the hell did we split up", was the unspoken question.

A lot of the rest of the weekend was unspoken, too. Suffice to say that Linda and I are now back together, stronger than ever and [insert favourite "spend rest of lives" style quip, cliché, rhetoric or otherwise].

"Life is just a bowl of toenails," as someone once sang. Although I may have paraphrased slightly. And I've just started the previous sentence with a conjunction. And that one. Damn it.

Normal Service Will Be Resumed...

Well. That was quite a number of months wandering around in the wild.

It seems that I was a lot more depressed than I thought I was, looking back. But when you're there, you're kind of numb to it all. That's one of the reasons I haven't Blogged for so long.

Work was drying up, me and the lady had split up, and I was caught up in that horrible "don't want to see anyone but why doesn't anyone ask me out for a drink" Catch 22 situation. I was seriously considering being "yeller", packing my bags and moving back to ol' Blighty.

Then at the end of June, I got a job. A proper, paid, regular 9-to-5 job as a programmer.

Things have definitely changed in the month or so. I see my colleagues every day - human contact at last! Working for yourself - especially in the kind of job I had - tends to make you stir crazy, which in my state a while back compounded the problem. I've also just enrolled for Swedish lessons, something I should have done a long time ago. But in September, I start learning the lingo. It's an intensive 6-week, 2 lessons a week course, held at folkuniversetet. All being well, after the course I'll take a little break, then sign up for the follow-on intermediate course.

Oh, and me and the lady are dating again. No rushing, just taking it nice and slow.

Yep, it was pretty bad, looking back. But now I'm looking forward again.

Huzzah!

Well, it took 'em almost 5 months in total, but I finally have a telephone line and ADSL!

I received a call on my mobile yesterday afternoon at 15:00 from the engineer, saying that he had fixed the ADSL. Apparently he had been there since 9:00 in the morning trying to fix it. Whoever had been appointed to switch my line on in the first place had botched the job up so much, that this engineer was a little surprised that I actually had a phone line at all!

I celebrated this fact by sitting on Slaygon's sofa and carrying on working, not wanting to come home and find that said engineer was actually lying -- not that he would want to, just that I have become cynical about this whole sorry situation. But as soon as I finally plucked up the courage to come back here (about 18:00), I found that he was in fact telling the truth, and I celebrated by broadcasting an impromptu show on SLAY Radio!

So I'm sitting here in my robe, looking out of my own window and noticing that it's snowing here in Gothenburg again. I have to visit Slaygon's flat with by backpack, to bring my laptop back... but I think it can wait a few hours!

+++NO CARRIER

My ADSL connection was due to be switched on last Tuesday (13th). But, as you have probably guessed, it wasn't. The line has been connected, but they have neglected to "sync the modem", whatever the hell that means. I've been phoning them since that day, and basically they were saying that we have to wait for Telia's engineers to do it (Telia "own" the phonelines themselves).

But thankfully, something positive is being done now. I got through to a guy who was just as annoyed as I was, and promised to raise a Support Ticket. "Unfortunately," he said, "it looks like it is definitely a problem at the local exchange station, which means you'll have to wait another few days while we assign a local engineer". But at least he was being honest with me. We tried a few things that I could try with my modem, but to no avail. What gave me the positive vibe was that he actually phoned me back about 15 minutes after our initial conversation, to confirm that he had assigned a Support Ticket for me, and gave me the reference number so I can track it.

So, I'm still hot-footing it to Slaygon's every day while we wait another few days. Still, onwards and upwards eh?!

Treading Water

It was time for me to host another DJ session at the Kville Biljard last Saturday (27th), running from 21:00 through to closing time at 01:00 in the morning. It was a bit weird this time, though. Firstly, it was a different crowd. When I last played there, we had people of all ages in; so I was able to do a great mix of stuff right from the 1970s up to present time. This time, however, it was mainly people with an oldest age of mid-twenties. Therefore I had to resort to "Plan B". This involves me screwing up my "fall-back playlist" and making everything up, mainly present-day stuff which -- in my ever so humble opinion -- doesn't work in a biljard. They're repetitive and boring - great for a dance hall but not for people playing pool.

The aforementioned "fall-back playlist" is just a piece of paper with some "classics" on it, so if my brain has a "dunno what to play" moment, I can just play something from the paper. Not so this time!

The second problem was that I'm suffering from DMF at the moment. If you don't know what that is, it's "Deadly Man Flu", which is the male version of the common cold. Most men collapse into a gibbering wreck when they catch it and become convinced that they're about to die. Actually, I usually try and ignore it. This is actually too far in the other extreme, because if you just try and work through it, it will actually get worse. Anyway, I'm taking it easy now, but having to work through it while DJing is actually very weird; I was having an "out of body" experience for most of the time. But, I got through it, so no worries.

I treated myself to a Bolognese last night, to help me through my DMF (bolognese actually being a "ragu" as the Italians would call it). I cheat by using a jar of Dolmio, but then I add my own onion, red pepper and garlic. I also added chilli to the whole thing, making it a sort of Chili Ragu Con Carne or something! But I made it nice and hot to clear my airwaves. It did the trick a little too well though. I like my food hot (spice-wise), and I overdid it slightly. My nose was certainly running afterwards; but unfortunately something else was running too . Cue appropriate "Ring of Fire" song by Johnny Cash! The rest of the night saw me desparately trying to avoid sneezing!

I'll be doing my usual SLAY Radio show tomorrow evening, even if the cold hasn't gone away. I'm a consummate professional y'know! (read: Idiot.)

Snö, w00t!

It finally happened on Saturday - we had snow in Gothenbug! Yay! I say "yay" because we actually need it here. Instead of snowing, it's been raining a lot since winter crept in; because of this, there have been lots of floods where rivers have been bursting their banks. Snow is the lesser of the two evils.

Plus, snow has a psychological side, too, as Martin (one of the bar staff at Kville Biljard) reminded me: winter is always a dismal month, and when it's dull and wet, it compounds the miserable feeling that everyone has. When there's snow on the ground, however, it brightens the evenings up and lifts peoples' spirits.

Unfortunately, it only lasted about five hours. Snow turned to hail which turned to rain, and melted all the snow again. But today (Monday), it's seriously trying to snow again - the flakes are very small, there's not many of them and they're fluttering down very slowly, but it's trying at least. Let's hope it settles soon. Or, let's just skip winter and get to Spring

The ADSL saga continues, but in a positive way - sort of! I've finally got my phone line! Unfortunately I had to wait while the ADSL department's database "synched up" with the telephone department, so that was a week's worth of thumb-twiddling. Then I finally placed my order for ADSL last Thursday. Now, thanks to their stupid automated system (and the fact that they don't want to help me out, even after all the problem's I've had), I now have to wait "4-6 weeks" before I get the connection. Poo! But at least it's on it's way, I suppose.

Ups and Downs

t's been exactly a month since I last wrote an entry, such is my "habit" of writing a blog! What's been happening? Well, instead of trying to do it chronologically, I'll just do it by topic.

The Christmas period has come and gone, and plans changed at the last minute for various reasons. Instead of me spending Christmas in England and Linda spending it with her maternal grandparents in Norway, we decided to have a quiet Christmas together. So, I went over to England a week early instead. But because of having to see lots of family, I didn't get to see everyone I wanted to, so Linda and I will be going over to England around March time. But it was all good. I got to see my grandmother who is now 90 years old, bless her. And Linda and I had a lovely time. For New Year, we were in Gothenburg with some friends. It was quiet and grown up - well, until we drank a lot of beer, champagne, G&T and wine!

The Tele2 story continues, but has taken a significant step forward - earlier today, in fact. An engineer came round and fixed the line. There was a fault (which had actually started going wrong when Linda had the flat), and because it's owned by Telia, Tele2 were waiting for them (Telia are the BT of Sweden - I rest my case). BUT, now I have a working telephone line! Tomorrow Tele2 should be phoning me about the ADSL - but I can see myself having to phone them. After all, the engineer was supposed to phone me last Friday to confirm the time of the appointment, but didn't. He phoned me at 9:00 this morning saying he was outside my door. "That's a shame," I said, "I'm in Trollhättan. You were supposed to phone me on Friday," I added, pointedly.

"Oh." said the engineer. "When will you be back?"

"Two o'clock," I said.

"Oh. I'll come then."

"Do that," I said. Thankfully he kept his promise and fixed the line within 20 minutes.

Expanding on that note, I was in Trollhättan this weekend. I was supposed to be in Gothenburg doing a DJ set at the biljard, but Linda had a bit of a fever so I cancelled and went over there. She could have survived without me, really, but several things happened to me since the new year, including something that happened on Saturday morning. It just made it easier for me to run off.

There is a preamble I wanted to add to this blog, but for legal reasons, I'll keep it out for now.

On Saturday morning at 7:30am, I was woken up by some bloke visiting my next door neighbour, and being none-too-quiet about it. Next door neighbour had already left at around 5am (I know because I heard the noisy bastard). After a couple of minutes of banging on the door, he walked off. However, after about 10 minutes, I was dropping off to sleep, and was suddenly woken up again by a few big bangs and clattering. Then the bloke came storming up the stairs again with one or two of his friends, banged on the door again, shouting through his letterbox. Then banging MY door and shouting through MY letterbox again to see if he was here. After another 5 or so minutes of that, they went downstairs again, shouting loudly in frustration.

When I went downstairs later in the day, I found that the banging was that they had tipped all the bins over, and smashed the window to the door that served our stairwell. That was it for me. After consultation with Linda, we phoned the landlord up and told him that said neighbour has to go. At which point I also went to Trollhättan to get away from it all and have a quiet weekend with Linda.

When I came back today, it's all very quiet in the neighbour's place. I'm assuming he's laying low for a bit.

Anyway, that's the main points of my life over the past month. Let's see what happens next, eh?!